Fingering…


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A Series of Letters to the First Girl I Ever Fingered

Dear Emily,Hi! How are you? I hope this letter finds you well. I don’t know if you remember me or not, but I’m the guy who fingered you at sleepaway camp.Anyway, I was just thinking about that, so I thought I would write and see how everything turned out with you.

Your Friend (kind of),

Michael Ian Black

******************************************************

Dear Emily,

After not getting a response, I have become very worried that my last letter somehow offended you. Confused, I reread what I wrote several times, and finally came to the conclusion that, if you were offended, it was probably the part about fingering you that did it.

If so, I am very sorry. Not about fingering you (which was great), but about referring to it so candidly after not communicating with you in over 20 years. So, I’m sorry. In the future, if I refer to fingering you at all, I will try to be a little more discreet.

Very Sorry,

Michael Ian Black

**************************************************************

Dear Emily,

Hi, it’s me again (the guy who f-ed you). Still haven’t heard back from you. Is everything okay between us?

Write Back,

Michael Ian Black

P.S. That’s a rhyme – «Write Back/Michael Ian Black» LOL!

************************************************************

Dear Emily,

Oh my God! I just realized that when I said I «f-ed you» in my last letter, that easily could be read as «fucked you.» God forbid your husband or lover (lesbian?) should read that! If that person IS reading THIS letter, I did NOT fuck your wife/lover. I just fingered her. I was just trying to be discreet about referencing it, which is why I used the initial «f» for «fingering.» Total brain fart!

Please tell Emily to write me back. Or Emily, if you are the one reading this, sorry about calling you a lesbian in the previous paragraph (unless you actually ARE a lesbian, in which case I am TOTALLY cool with that) Did my fingering you turn you gay? I hope not.

Sorry Again,

Michael Ian Black

Διαβαστε τη συνεχεια εδω:

http://www.cracked.com/index.php?name=News&sid=1843

 Axxx δολιε Ιαν.. Μαζι σου ρε ψυχαρα

7 comments

  1. Eko-Tiger

    Αυτό μ’αρέσει στους ξένους βρε παιδί μου. Που ποτέ δεν περνά από το μυαλό τους ότι ο ταχυδρόμος μπορεί να έκανε λάθος τη διεύθυνση…Μάλλον μόνο στην Ελλάδα τα ΕΛ-ΤΑ θα έπρεπε να λέγονται ΣΚΑ-ΤΑ…

  2. Larry Gus

    και επίσης μου φέρνει στο μυαλό το καλύτερο σπαμ που μου έχει έρθει ποτέ (μετά το wanna bang like a horse?, εννοείται)

    «your mother knows you watch girls fingering»

  3. Eko-Tiger

    Γι’αυτό η μαμά μου δεν με πήγαινε κατασκήνωση όταν είμουν μικρός? Επειδή είχα χοντρά δάχτυλα? Ή μήπως επειδή είμουν σφιχτοκώλης? Οου τζιιιι!

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